Monday, August 14, 2006

Snakes on a Motherfucking Catwalk, Part 2

Don't think I've forgotten about you, Tyra.

You can pretend you're not part of what's going on down there at Santa Monica and Sepulveda, Tyra. You can pretend you're just "talent" and bear no responsibility for the strike. But that's what makes you all the more culpable, sweetheart. You're not legally required to get involved or take a stand or make things difficult for the rest of the sweatshop owners over there at the C/W. But that's what doing the right thing is all about. Doing it because you CAN AND YOU SHOULD not because you HAVE TO.

And you can. And you should. You're morally obligated to speak up. And you know what? I don't even care if you disagree with what they're doing. Stand up and SAY THAT. At least have the courage of your convictions.

I can't imagine the size of the Mrs. Beasley's muffin basket you sent to Mel Gibson thanking him for getting your name out of the trades for a little while. And yeah, sure, being a drunken bigot's a little rougher than being the postermodel for the Reality Sweatshop Movement, but at least that motherfucker knows how to make a strong choice and COMMIT TO THE MOMENT. He's like some fantastic Stanislavsky/Martin Boorman love child conjuring sense memories from his Holocaust-denying father while staggering Kurtz-like through Malibu waiting for Leni Refenstahl to yell cut and fix it all in post.

But I digress. The point is, at least Mel cares enough to call.

You, on the other hand, twiddle while the writers who make your show burn. I went down to the picket line. I walked with these people. They love their job. They're good at it. Some of them have been with the show for FIVE SEASONS. You know them. You like bringing your mom on the show? These people are your family, too.

And by the way? They're writers. Nobody working for the show has suggested they are not writers. And all that bullshit about making them go through the NLRB and doing a formal petition for a vote? Did that happen recently when your EDITORS became union?

Uh, no.

So you're swaddled in handlers and PR birds circle your head and sing in your ear and every day another celebrity gets drunk and pops off and ruins it for all the other drunk celebrities and God knows that's just another reason to hunker down in your hurricane shelter made of chinchilla, good intentions and leftover plywood walls from the season six top model house. Who can blame you for closing your eyes and clicking your Manolos and hoping that the whole thing blows over and you with nary a hair out of place?

But you're not really Dorothy in this story, are you? You're more like the Cowardly Lion.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

First Biznatches!

8/14/2006 5:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's alive!

8/14/2006 5:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's awful about the reality TV writers because really, they are the most talented of all writers. Who else could write such reality into television? Certainly not Josh Friedman with his tripod aliens and Terminator TV series.

8/14/2006 6:05 PM  
Blogger Robert Green said...

there is a fundamental issue at play here that seems unacknowleged:

we call the whole genre "reality" and make many assumptions based on rules that are simply not based in...reality.

for instance, since as any freshman philosophy stoner might remember everything only exists in relationship to its absence or opposite, "reality" tv suggests that it is fundamentally different from "scripted" tv. and of course, scripted tv has, you know, script writers. so surely "reality" tv doesn't. otherwise it would just be scripted, and a lot of dominoes would start to fall. one: all the employees would be subject to rules created by 30 plus years of hard bargaining by a union. two: viewers wouldn't feel like they were seeing inside "real" people's souls--it would just be "scripted" tv, which is to say it would just be tv. three: our national epidemic of schadenfreude would have to be put on hold--since this is the essential thing about reality tv--you can say "look at that fucking idiot in the wifebeater t-shirt hitting his wife" even as you sit in your wife-beater t-shirt and wish you had the guts to hit your wife.

so to admit that the whole thing is a fake, is a put on, is the very antithesis of "reality" (and has been since season one of the real world, shit since faye dunaway [fine, you writing assholes, paddy chayefsky] suggested doing a show about the SLA that was "real") and is just another tv show would bring the whole house of cards down, THAT is the issue here. and the money thing. you know, the one josh mentioned.

N.B. i work for a company that is very successful in the reality genre, and while i don't do that stuff for them, i will say nonetheless that reality tv is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.

8/14/2006 8:42 PM  
Blogger Thomas Rufer said...

I like sense of humor! I laugh at times and that's a lot! Btw, it's Riefenstahl. With an "i". It was just a typo of yours. Neverthless I wanted to point it out.

8/14/2006 9:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

puhlease. this is ridiculous. first of all, don't forget the writer's don't NOT have health insurance. they just pay for it themselves. like me. it's called fucking freelancing.

second of all, cry me a river. they get paid good money for an easy job. the truth is that the unionized tv-writers ARE GROTESQUELY OVERPAID. these reality writers are getting a fare wage.

go dig a ditch for eight bucks an hour and then let's talk about unfair wages.

and finally, why the hell does tyra have to have an opinion on this topic? you assume she is hiding in fear. maybe she just thinks it's a complicated issue and doesn't have a side.

it's not the end of the world that she isn't knee-jerk rahrah'ing for people just because they happen to have the same job as you.

8/15/2006 3:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The backlash begins...

Congrats Josh - I guess this means you've finally made it!

8/15/2006 3:58 AM  
Blogger Mike said...

The Boorman/ Stanislavsky/ Holocaust/ Malibu/ Kurtz/ Reifenstahl sentence is stunning.

8/15/2006 4:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My head is itchy.
Does that count as reality?

8/15/2006 4:15 AM  
Blogger Peggy Archer said...

You go, boy!

If I weren't on a show right now I'd be down at the picket lines, too.

Anyone who's ever met a reality TV show producer knows that doing anything on those shows isn't easy.

8/15/2006 6:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait I thought the whole point of reality shows is that the writers are on strike?

I mean, that's all I heard about for years was that- Oh shit, writers are on strike and we can't have real shows so we'll have reality shows cause they don't need writers?

I mean I have no idea what's going on. I mean, you know, whatever.

8/15/2006 8:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Josh,a.k.a another muggle,

Haven't been on in a long while, so I hadn't had the chance to 'miss' you - however in taking a peek this weekend it's nice to see these entries - you're delicious!

"...rolled up in the Death Star Escalade."

I so pictured you in a mini-cooper my muggle cyber pal?

I am unable to watch or even listen to scary commercials, so for me to go to 'Snakes' or even the up coming 'Dahlia'will be challenging, however I am on my way to 'Snakes'today - I have a couple of hours to spare before my next chunk of clients and I'm going to see if this will be easier in the daylight? (Duh, Laura :) )

If I survive I'll check in...

Chau for now from this muggle to you and regards to your dad! :)


8/15/2006 9:13 AM  
Blogger Ryan said...

I don't think listing writers on reality shows will make viewers believe the show is any more or less real than they do now.

For one thing, I don't think regular people read the credits.

And secondly, watching some reality shows, it's obvious some stuff is directly written (even without any credited writers), but that doesn't make the show any more or less real.

And finally, we seem to have managed to let theatrical many documentaries have credited writers without destroying the form. I think we'd be okay with having writers on reality TV... especially since we already have writers on reality TV, we're just pretending they don't exist.

8/15/2006 10:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Regarding ditch diggers who only make $8 dollars an hour, I don't understand this reasoning. So, if anyone, anywhere in the world, is worse off than you, you have no right to complain or try to do better?

Si, se puede!

8/15/2006 11:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, Colleen, it just means that "unfair" is a relative term.

And all this self-congratulatory back-patting on how Friedman is fighting the good fight comes off a little ridiculous when put in perspective.

8/15/2006 12:15 PM  
Blogger Dean ASC said...

You can say anything you want with snakes in the title this week. You've earned it.

8/15/2006 1:54 PM  
Blogger stee said...

You're right, honkeytonkmofo. Thanks for putting the entire concept of the labor movement and capitalism into "perspective" with your succinct comparisons.

"Puhlease" indeed!

8/15/2006 3:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Did you survive - I'm on the graveyard shift, so please entertain me and us and let us know if you thought it was too scary.

I thought it was flippin' brilliant man! Flippin' brilliant!


8/15/2006 6:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Josh goes months without posting after he successfully gets thousands of people to become fans of his blog. Now, after a long hiatus he starts writing again, but this time about some boring writers' labor dispute?

Josh, not that you need this blog or the fans to come read it, but this new topic is a really big buzz killer. You having an imaginary (one-way) conversation with Tyra reminds me of when Dan Quayle talked to Murphy Brown from a podium. Tyra seems about as real as the Murphy Brown character.

I'm sure the writers' troubles are serious, but it's just not interesting. How 'bout something lighter?

8/15/2006 10:17 PM  
Blogger Flea said...

It don't get much lighter than Tyra, sugarpie.

8/15/2006 10:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Another post! Sweet.

Tyra is the face of the show - she needs to make a statement either way. It's the responsible thing to do.

8/16/2006 12:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait. Does reality get rewritten?

8/16/2006 8:23 AM  
Blogger Robert Green said...

a follow on: ironies abound! in the UK, they call this genre "non-scripted". and, of course, without a script, you can't bloody well have a scriptwriter, now can you?

i thought not.

get back to work, you people-who-put-words-on-paper-that-other-people-speak

8/16/2006 8:37 AM  
Blogger coltrane said...

People are still getting hung up on the "reality TV has writers?" thing, so I'll restate. This is what most of reality show writers do -- They comb through hours of logged footage. They find the good stuff and assemble it into some kind of structured story. They write narration where necessary. They pass this along to the editors, who cut it together. They don't script the episode out beforehand. At most they'll write intros and lines for the hosts to say during the shoot, although in my experience the people who do this job and who do the former (and the people who I believe are striking) are not the same.

8/16/2006 9:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol I just wanted to let you know that there is a song titled "snakes on a plane" by Cobra Starship. I believe the beginning of the song is the same line Sam Jackson says in the movie...

8/16/2006 5:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Laua said, "If I survive I'll check in..."


Dude, it's been more than 24 hours and I think our smart one/ Laura is gone - you killed her.
You bad bad man.

Laura, "This is the Uniteed States Marine Corp, is there anyone who can here me, please yell for help."

8/16/2006 7:46 PM  
Blogger LL said...

Happy Snakes on an Anniversary.

8/16/2006 8:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know, Josh. It sounds like you're using the striking reality show writers to get close to Tyra. We all read about how much you love her. We know how she intoxicates you.

If only you could touch her dress and have her look you directly in the eye. Then you would have it and you could scream and run home with a precious gift.

You might be fierce but what about that awful rejection that's certain to come if you get anywhere near her? She will not have a problem so much with your skin texture as she will with the tone and then you're in trouble.

And you'll mention you're a writer and she'll lump you in her mind with those story carving hacks of the forced famous. So you will try to differentiate yourself as a true story teller, but she'll only be interested in your ideas if they involve her in a story she can tell with her eyes.

This is madness you're pursuing.

8/16/2006 10:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Way to work it on the motherfucking catwalk, Josh. You go, girl! You're Tyra's new Naomi Campbell.

8/17/2006 7:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stop with the ranting and make with the funny.

8/17/2006 8:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Anonymous,

I'll address the 'anon' who addressed me, Laura - unless you are all the same person?

I'm alive and frightened! ( I feel sorry for any worm I see next while gardening.)

That movie was sooooooooooo real it scared me out of my pants! I stood in front of my seat the WHOLE time!

(I made sure I sat in the last row, first seat - that's the one closest to the door, aaaccckkk!)

At times, I has to place my fingers in my ears and hummmm, because the music and the scene were just tooooo much to take! :(

( I know, "ya big baby Laura!")

Anyway... Joshua sir you so scary rule - I don't love you right now, but just like giving birth, I'll soon forget my fright and go purchase another ticket for say,... The Black Dahlia?!

I can do it.
I can do it.
I can do it.

xoxoLL :)

8/17/2006 10:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

remind me to NEVER invite you to a special screening of a scary movie again mi amiga, laura!
I think I was more scared of your screaming than the damn movie.
You are retarded, and yes she did stand the whole time!

Ooy, veh, but a big kiss to you my love.

8/17/2006 12:11 PM  
Blogger Rose said...

"Reality Television Writer"

Wouldn't you just love to have that on your resume? "Yup, that's right, I write reality"... Kind of like being God or Yaweh or James Earl Jones or something isn't it?

The fact that they can turn "reality" into interesting television is really a credit to how awesome they are. I mean, I live in reality... (some of the time)... I know how utterly boring it is. I also had the pleasure of living with a model, and that was not NEARLY as fun as portrayed. (Except that one time she got really drunk, ... what am I saying? "That one time", ha! ... and puked all over the kitchen, and me as I tried to carry her to the bathroom, and next to the toilet once I got her there, and into her pillow next to the bucket I had provided her. No really, to appreciate this you need to understand that she is 6' of unco-operative puking power. I am a relatively tiny and powerless 5'4.)

Where was I going with this? I don't know. Been reading through your blog, Josh, awesome. And I have to say this:

"an ad campaign centered around celebrity inmates and their desire to eat Kraft Macaroni and Cheese as their final meal."

is a fucking brilliant idea. :D

Then again, that's why I'm living in Chickenfat, Canada, selling sports clothing, and not creating ad campaigns for Kraft.


8/17/2006 12:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Meanwhile, did you show up downtown for the Immigration rallies? I mean really, if you've every actually been in a sweatshop and seen the working conditions, you'd pick a different analogy. And, no, all human suffering is not equal, nor should we PC-it into being equal. We can have compassion and solidarity for one another without resorting to outrageousness.

8/17/2006 3:24 PM  
Blogger Lynda said...

Sorry, I don't watch America's Top Model. I just wanted to wish you good luck on your cancer fight. I lost my sister last October to non-smoking related lung cancer and my husband had testicular cancer, but he has been free and clear for almost 15 years now.

Keep fighting the good fight!

8/17/2006 3:53 PM  
Blogger josh said...

I did show up for the immigration rallies. But as a former Board Member of the Writer's Guild I thought maybe I was a little more qualified to write about television.

Thanks for the good wishes.

8/17/2006 4:06 PM  
Blogger Lisa D said...

There are mothereffin' snakes on your mothereffin' blog comments section ;-)

8/18/2006 6:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love the people telling you to write something funny. Yeah, Josh. You're our monkey. Dance, monkey, dance!

And they don't understand how writers might be a little on edge about their treatment sometimes.

8/18/2006 12:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

look, this is all well and good but it's time to get back to the things that made this blog great: the crimson ape, the dumb fucking lesbian and snakes on a plane!

8/18/2006 2:54 PM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...


I had to find out the hard way that there are a lot of writers out there that don't even consider reality television a creative enterprise. So not only is Tyra Banks kind of a piece of shit but there's surprisingly little support from our fellow writers.

Thank God for you Josh!

By the way, have you received any tyoe of official thanks from Newline Cinema or Sam Jackson for the hype?

8/18/2006 5:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

is it just me or is the whole monkey-metaphor thing that josh does really lame?

or maybe it's just gotten old. but i swear to god if he does one more post where he stretches this image to it's dying limits, then i am going to start blaming him (and not the directors/producers/studios) for how bad his movies are.

8/18/2006 5:36 PM  
Blogger Julie Goes to Hollywood said...

Josh, you're not a real blogger until you've been visited by the Hostile Anonymous Commenteer.

As for your post, I am glad you are thinking with your upper head and holding Tyra's bony ass accountable to the people. Solidarity, dude.

8/19/2006 10:30 AM  
Blogger joy said...

bony ass?!!!!

8/19/2006 7:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i love angry josh

8/19/2006 8:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yay, he's back!
I'll snag what I can when he feels like blogging. Totally worth it.
Here's the plan.
Pretend to have a phobia of 'Supermodels' and get on Tyra's talk show so she can hold your hand and then ask her about the strike.

8/19/2006 9:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You sure do know what's important in this world. Maybe that cancer was God's way of trying to spare us from your fatuity.

8/20/2006 2:11 AM  
Blogger Tim Woods said...

wow! turns out josh actually wrote snakes on a plane!

i bet john heffernan, sebastian gutierrez and david dalessandro will be surprised to hear about that!

8/20/2006 6:54 AM  
Blogger Ronnie Pudding said...

Aren't there less reprehensible groups to rally behind, like scheisse porn producers or crack dealers? Reality TV is a tumor on our culture. Do the architects of this creative melanoma really deserve the same treatment as the folks bringing us The Sopranos, The Wire, The Office, My Name is Earl, West Wing or hell… The War at Home? You know, actual creative people writing actual words?

Instead of trying to be Cesar Chavez in Prada these people should be thanking Xenu they've actually managed to carve out a semi-lucrative niche in this sonofabitchin' industry. If WGA benefits are what they want, I suggest sitting down in front of the word-box and writing a crappy LOST spec like everybody else. I mean just because I can start my car in the morning doesn't make me a mechanic; if they want to be called writers, they should be forced to WRITE.

I hope Tyra runs those cretins over with a Panzer tank. She's a Goddess and deserves all the cocaine and laxatives her last 15 minutes affords her. Those unthankful bastards aren't fit to clean up her bulimia vomit.

8/20/2006 1:25 PM  
Blogger Jesse Custer said...

Tenspeed and Brownshoe (who some of us know is actually Kevin Arbouet, a hack who is to writer/producers as back room abortionists are to brain surgeons) writes:

"I had to find out the hard way that there are a lot of writers out there that don't even consider reality television a creative enterprise."

Kevin found this out on his blog after writing a self-aggrandizing post about a reality abomination he recently produced. Two successful, critically acclaimed professional screenwriters (you know, actual wordsmiths - craftsmen who conjure story and character out of the white void of nothingness) engaged Kevin in an intelligent debate. How did he respond?

By deleting their posts. Not only that, but Kevin deleted certain posts through the chain to make it seem like commenters were agreeing with him rather than nay saying his infantile thoughts. Which ironically is all reality show "writers" do: copy, paste and edit to contort the truth into a lie.

When my colleagues called him on this behavior in subsequent posts, Kevin did what all great writers do when faced with an intelligent polemic. He disabled the comment section on his blog. You, sir, are a coward.

You lack neither the conviction of your opinion nor the basic language skills necessary to exist in a public forum, so do us all a favor and stop kissing every screenwriter's ass within blogging distance. "Thank God for you Josh! ...have you received any tyoe of official thanks from Newline Cinema or Sam Jackson for the hype?" Tenspeed and Brownshoe? More like Onespeed and Brownnose.

Stop spraying your piss around like a frightened cat, marking territory on this and every other screenwriter’s website, making your vain attempts to live vicariously through the skills of writers far more adept at the craft than you will ever be. No one cares what you have to say.

8/20/2006 3:31 PM  
Blogger mister blue eyes said...

I thought you would find this interesting, a teaser ad for a screenplay to be offered on eBay. The name is "LONE PHOTO", about a barber who tells a customer, his Aunt has a photo of the JFK assassanation, she kept hidden for over forty years, and the barber wants the guy to auction it for him...on eBay! Here's the link:

8/20/2006 4:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I had to find out the hard way that there are a lot of writers out there that don't even consider reality television a creative enterprise."

I have to assume that "finding out the hard way" means you actually had to speak to some real writers....

I've admitted earlier that I'm somewhat ambivalent about the whole issue of letting these folks into the WGA. Josh's passion - as well as John Rogers - have swayed me a bit, but leave us not be ridiculous here.

Back when 2 Live Crew was under fire for obscenity, all the good minded people supported their right to be filthy and offensive, but that didn't mean we had to start pretending they were actually good rappers.

Yes, technically speaking, reality TV IS a creative enterprise. Something is created. When I eat my dinner, digest my food, and take a dump that comes out looking like Mickey Mouse, that doesn't make me a sculptor. It doesn't even make me a Disney animator.

I will grudgingly support the rights of reality show "writers" to be part of our Guild. But please, God, do not try to sell me on the insane, insulting and idiotic notion that what they do bears any resemblance to what I do for a living. That really is too much.

8/20/2006 5:51 PM  
Blogger josh said...

I appreciate Mr. Olson's open-mindedness on this matter and I'm happy there's a semi-serious debate on this. Remember a couple things: we're not the Good Writer's Guild or the Average Writer's Guild. We're the Writer's Guild. All writers, big and tall, great and small. You may hate reality, you may think it's a scourge. But nobody (certainly not the Top Model brass) is arguing that these people aren't writers. That is NOT part of their reasoning for not paying them. The reason they don't want to pay them is because they're cheap.

8/20/2006 6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

--He's like some fantastic Stanislavsky/Martin Boorman love child conjuring sense memories from his Holocaust-denying father while staggering Kurtz-like through Malibu waiting for Leni Refenstahl to yell cut and fix it all in post.--

Holy fucking SHIT, that is one hell of a sentence.

Anyway, Josh, if you actually manage to read through all these replies -- the key to maintaining a blog is to write it for yourself, not for the readers. It's not a job, there's no quota. No need to think that if you can't make at least one post a month you might as well give it up. The result of your sporadic posting is that every single entry here is worth reading.

8/20/2006 8:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Every word you say is true. Every one. But it's hard to ignore the truth in Mr. Pudding's comments about the nature of reality TV and its relationship with our cultural posterior. It irks. It pains. It causes the gnashing of teeth and the pulling of hair and the asking of the big questions. To wit: Why don't we open the doors to porno writers, too? Honestly, at least they actually bring a little real joy into the world from time to time.

At a certain point, is it really good for us to just open the doors to anyone who thinks that what they do constitutes writing? Where do we draw the line? If we take in reality TV "writers" now, what's to stop the mid-level studio execs who decide the hero's car should be green instead of red from declaring themselves writers, too?

Blech. Bleargh. Hack, ptui!

8/20/2006 10:08 PM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...

If there's anything that I've strived for over the years, it's to be referred to as a Back Room Abortionist.

I have conquered.

Now on to things that my ex-girlfriends wouldn't say about me...

I think we're forgetting that there are different type of reality shows. When we think of reality shows we tend to automatically think of Flava of Love or The Real World. But we're forgetting the shows that are Host driven and that requires tons and tons of dialogue. Contrary to what some actors might want everyone to believe, that dialogue certainly doesn't write itself.

Regardless of what we think of the medium, we need to band together. After all, it wasn't a short time ago that film writers looked down upon television writers.

8/21/2006 9:01 PM  
Blogger Rose said...

This is an interesting discussion, and I want to go out on a limb here and ponder the likeness of reality television writers to screenplay adaptation writers. Isn't the process strangely similar?

Book to screen is an extremely creative process. To take such a large chunk of material, much of which is detail that wouldn't translate to screen in an entertaining fashion, and create (note the use of the word) a version that people will actually pay to watch... carefully choose what to keep, what to remove, and how to convey the series of events in a visual medium in the most effective manner... is MOST DEFINITELY worthy of the title "writer". (Whether good, bad, or "the book was better".)

Where is the difference with a reality television "writer"?

They are given a large amount of material, and I'm sure it's full of tedious everyday detail, to turn into entertaining television. I'm sure that this process is just as creative as any other, and sure it must deserve the title. Doesn't it?

I can't say I'm a fan of a lot of reality television, but it IS an interesting idea to consider. Like anything, there are a few gold nuggets in a giant pile of shit. I just don't think audiences have seen enough of the gold to dismiss the shit yet.


8/21/2006 10:25 PM  
Blogger Jesse Custer said...

Well congratulations, Kevin Brownnose, because you're definitely one of the fevered egos trying to scratch his way inside this industry by poking everything you see with a bloody hanger.

And for the record, TOP MODEL is not quality alternative programming. This is:

8/21/2006 11:06 PM  
Blogger ThymeHBF said...

Josh -

I like reading what you write because you are a great writer - a blog is a place for you to write whatever the hell you want - I cannot believe these comments! Get a grip people!! This is supposed to be fun and interesting not!

8/22/2006 3:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The best blog on the planet has now officially "jumped the snake."

8/22/2006 7:19 AM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...


Unfortunately, that is precisely why industry blogs eventually turn off the comments page. For every person who appreciates the effort and the intention, there are some sad, angry little mops that tear it up.

Some people in the industry actually want to help each other and together. But among writers, this is fairly common. That's why the WGA continously gets their asses kicked by the DGA. They may be just as pretentious but they're not as destructive towards each other.

I won't retaliate against Jesse because I pretty much know his deal. Once he actually starts working in this business, hopefully his tune will change a bit. Maybe not. Either way, good luck Jesse Custer. Your attitude won't help on your journey. Maybe you're so ridiculously talented that people will look past it.

8/22/2006 9:08 AM  
Blogger ThymeHBF said...

Precisely! One of the main reasons that I left LA and the biz!

8/22/2006 9:26 AM  
Blogger Johnny said...

jack the moon jumper:
you're thinking EDITORS. and yes, they deserve all the credit on unscripted television. UN-fucking-scripted television.

josh o:
keep in mind, geniuses pick green...

8/22/2006 10:59 AM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...

Reality Television and UnScripted Television are not mutually exclusive.

Again, there are Hosted Reality Shows that are heavily scripted.

Fear Factor
America's Next Top Model
American Idol
American's Got Talent

are just a few examples of reality shows that are scripted. Please, please, please, don't let personal tastes disenfranchise the writers that work on these shows. You may not like the form but there's a writer(s) working on the show and we shouldn't dismiss that.

You'd be suprised how much writing goes on in reality television. Not Editing but Writing.

Why is it so hard for us to stick together?

8/22/2006 11:35 AM  
Blogger Ronnie Pudding said...

Unfortunately, that is precisely why industry blogs eventually turn off the comments page. For every person who appreciates the effort and the intention, there are some sad, angry little mops that tear it up.


Part of the allure and power of BLOGOPOLIS is its reactivity.

Open comments are a good part what differentiates the organic, interactive nature of the interweb from the “hurling feces against hard cement” approach of a traditional, tree-murdering publication.

Josh F’s blog is arguably the best on the subject of screenwriting, and a big reason for this is his frankness. Another reason is his sense of humor. He chose to post on a subject that is controversial and with less levity than what we’re used to. The reaction he got should be expected. Good-natured debate should be expected.

But yeah, the “this post sucks, write more funny crimson ape stuff” camp needs to jump off a bridge.

Turning off comments, by the way, is cowardly.

8/22/2006 6:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"You'd be suprised how much writing goes on in reality television. Not Editing but Writing. "

I just know too many reality show editors to buy that.

"Why is it so hard for us to stick together?"

Not to be a stickler, but I have a hard enough time sticking together with screenwriters, who, on the whole, seem more concerned with money than with power. But I manage on the important issues. Asking me to stick together with people who do whatever it is "writers" on reality shows do doesn't go down well.

Again, I am in grudging support of these folks. But I do wonder, again, where we'll draw the line. When I wrote porn, I didn't expect the WGA to welcome me. And as I believe I've mentioned, I think porn is a far more honorable endeavor than reality television.

I'm actually kinda serious here. Many of us came up through the ranks of cheesy, straight to video non-union work. We had to fight and scramble to learn our chops both creatively and professionally, and moving into work that was recognized by the WGA was the carrot on the end of the stick. That system works for those of us who actually, you know, WRITE. I don't have a problem with reality show "writers" becoming actual writers. I applaud them. But why give them the reward before they've done the work?

I am, of course, open to changing my mind. Perhaps some day, reality TV will have its own Citizen Kane. Forgive me if I secretly pray for the demise of this hideous genre before that happens, though.

8/22/2006 7:01 PM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...

"I just know too many reality show editors to buy that."

For a show like The Real World, the editors truly make the show. They do work with the writers to develop some sort of storyline but I have to say, the editors are truly the post Captains of the Reality Ship.

However, shows like American Idol are highly scripted. Don't forget that the performances are just one part of the show. Most of what comes out of Ryan Seacrest's mouth, Cowell, Paula, Randy, and the contestants are scripted.

I can understand not necessarily being a fan of the genre but I applaud your objectiveness. Just keep in mind that all reality shows are not created equal. Just like other genres. Some reality shows skew more to talk shows, complete with cue cards. There was a reality show on television called, Scare Tactics that utilized complete scripts. They'd even add shots into the segments to give it a more "filmic" feel. And it's not like I'm giving anything away here but some of the actual people that were supposed to be pranked were actually actors. The show really sucked but it was as close to scripted television as you could get.

8/22/2006 9:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"So much of the writing work that's done out there -- I would venture to say thousands of writers -- we don't cover. Chief among that right now is the campaign we have going in reality TV to get those writers and editors covered." Patric Verrone, President of the WGAwest, May 20, 2006 Interview with

When a writer as prolific and talented as Josh Friedman takes the time to comment on the struggles of the WGA, I think it's a good thing. For those of you who are WGA members, you know that
there are some huge battles coming up which include: (1) the thousands of jobs in cable, animation, and reality tv which are not covered by the WGA; (2) digital downloading and the choice of ABC/CBS to pay residuals at the DVD rate (excluding 80% of the profit pool and paying a residual on a percentage of 20% of the total revenues; (3) How and if credited writers/WGA members will participate in the renenue when their work appears on YouTube, podcasting, mobisodes.

There are some enormous battles in front of the WGA if you don't want the tv/film industry to go the way of the the music industry.

This is NOT the time for WGA members or professional writers to be fighting with each other--save your energy for survival of the Talent Guilds.

8/22/2006 9:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just love your site. It's full of things that want to say to ohter people but for the sake of keeping the peace, I'd rather not. Your writing is admirable even though it's pretty strong. Well good luck and keep blogging.

8/23/2006 1:57 AM  
Blogger Jesse Custer said...

"I won't retaliate against Jesse because I pretty much know his deal. Once he actually starts working in this business..."

First of all, in responding to me by name, you are retaliating against me. A weak and uninspired retaliation, but a retaliation nonetheless. The only reason you tried to make it sound like you're taking the high road (and failed) is because you can't think of any insults that are nearly as clever as mine.

Second of all, I am in the industry, sport. Just because I didn't ruin Lauren Velez's career with the worst movie ever co-written and co-directed in the history of cinema doesn't mean I'm not paying the bills as a certified word ninja. I've never adapted an amusement park ride into a film though, so maybe that explains why your lips aren't currently on my rectum.

Third of all, this is reminiscent of the time on Mazin's blog when you told Josh Olson that he'd understand once he actually started working in this business, completely unaware that the man was already an Oscar nominated screenwriter. Guess you didn't "pretty much know his deal" either.

In summation, I'd like to answer a question that Kevin Brownnose asked in a subsequent post down the chain:

"Why is it so hard for us to stick together?"

I don't know, Captain Maudlin. Why don't you ask Rodney King why we can't all get along? Oh wait, I forgot. Rodney was pleading for racial harmony. You're just championing an artistically bankrupt medium and sucking another successful screenwriter's ass.

Oh, and I almost forgot. Good luck to you too, Kevin.

8/23/2006 3:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Watch the movie you started with your terrible writing. Go see snakes on a plane, you're down 10 million on opening weekend. So sad, bloggers have no real sway yet, what a lesson.

8/23/2006 12:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

C'mon, where's the official Josh Friedman review of Snake on a Plane: The Movie? Is it still worthy of a life philosophy? No excuse! Surely you have some response to the film that ought to be shared with the world. Did it live up to your expectations? We must know!

8/23/2006 4:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

jesse and t&b - you remind me of the end of y tu mama tambien. stop bickering and get on with it.

8/24/2006 2:58 AM  
Blogger Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...


The end of Y Tu Mama Tambien?!


Ok, but I'm not the guy wearing the Tighty Whiteys.

8/24/2006 11:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Aaaah, did you have to mention Y Tu Mama Tambien?!

Ooy Veyh!

I have this cut out of Gael Garcia, & Olivier (Martinez) in tuxedos taped to my photo printer in my office where I see my clients, and they are BY FAR the most exquisite looking men on the planet! (Johnny Depp is running a mean tie for first with the above.)

If I may add also, 'Y Tu Mama Tambien' surely didn't 'end' with bickering :)and although I think it came out in 2002, it's worth watching over to see the end. :)


8/24/2006 2:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ummm Anon,

What movie were you watching? (Murder Ball.)
'Tu Mama' has no, I repeat no, correlation to the blood slathering thats gone on here or anywhere in cyberspace between them two, hon'.
Their battle has no friendship - just truths about rivalry.
Hon' wrong correlation, but good attempt at making us less of an audience to their slicing.
Ummm ten & brown, why don't ya open your comment section hon' so you can keep your domestic disbutes on your own site, and not fake the 'take the high road' here or elsewhere - your business is yours hon'.
Brownose-ing & 'Y Tu Mama' is a little too far off the radar from Snakes, don't ya think?


8/25/2006 4:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Ok, but I'm not the guy wearing the Tighty Whiteys."

What?! You'd rather be the skinny guy in the towel?


ttfn, Flo

8/25/2006 5:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

squzzi all, the above font prints out differently...

"liiick" is what it looks like, but I meant 'iiiick'.

You're right deary, we are way off from Snakes, but that correction had to be made.

ttfn, Flo

8/25/2006 11:06 AM  
Blogger JUST ME said...

too bad you couldn't say that to her FACE.

I'd stand right behind you. So that when you were finshed,I could scream, 'that *fierce* enough for ya?!''d be fun.

8/26/2006 6:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gee I love to collapse the comments...

8/27/2006 10:42 AM  
Blogger the third coast said...


Thanks for fighting the good fight for writers.

I love your blog. Now that we're starting to see some intriguing promos for Black Dalia (and as a Noir fan, I'm looking forward to it), do you have some Dalia-related stories to share?

8/28/2006 6:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry bout your union problems but on a brighter note I saw Snakes on a Plane tonight. Laughed a LOT. It was just plane/plain fun. SPORKS? rotflmao!


8/29/2006 9:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

People are so ignorant and selfish. Pop culture keeps shoveling shit down your throat and you swallow it whole. I pity you. And I pity your children.

8/30/2006 3:42 AM  
Blogger Erwin said...

hey Josh,

Great stuff. As always.

So...can we expect something on "the Black Dahlia" in the...well...near future?

8/30/2006 10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why can't you be a man?

8/30/2006 10:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man did they not invite you to Venice man?

How come they invited Ellroy (Koepp)?

8/31/2006 2:18 AM  
Blogger Mrs Mopro said...

read some ravishing (hope i use the word i think i'm using) review of black dahlia in my german newspaper ýesterday. then i watched scarlett walking over the red carpet.
where the fuck were you???? i fear i've got to watch all of that crappy boulevardesque coverage of who's wearing what and all that shit just to....not spot you.

or is he in venice right now?

anyway...have a great time in old europe -cause that's where I hope you are right now- and enjoy your freedom.
a blog story from the venice film festival. my expectations are huge.

8/31/2006 4:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry for the delayed response, but Josh Olson said: "When I eat my dinner, digest my food, and take a dump that comes out looking like Mickey Mouse, that doesn't make me a sculptor.

Well... maybe not, but you could be a reality star -- provided some smart writer makes it a good narrative.

The sad thing about reality TV producer/writers is that their wages have been going down as each highly-profitable channel competes for cheaper and cheaper crap to put between the commercials.

An important point to remember about wages for working writers, creative producers, actors, etc. is that they are -- by nature of the industry -- usually not working.

And the industry expects them to be ready to rock on a moment's notice. AND do tons of meetings, pitches and auditions, all without pay. That's part of why creative positions -- even in the low end work -- need to pay more per week than workers who work normal hours, year round and have basic job security.

The issue here really is about people toiling in a industry -- awash w/ overpaid executives at fatcat media corporations -- and where a tiny handful of others at the top make obscene amounts of money -- being able to make a living wage that can actually support a family in Los Angeles.

May not be as funny as making the monkey dance, but I think it's a great topic. Thanks, Josh.

9/01/2006 4:17 PM  
Blogger oldTiago said...

Who te hell is Tyra? Keep in mind your europeans readers.

9/03/2006 6:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are obviously not current in European goings-on. Tyra is on a very popular show here counting down all the matches leading to Euro Cup '08. She roots for Belgium and is seen as kind of a tosser. She despises Italy, especially Totti, and likes to make fun of the point-shaving scandal there. She also hates writers.

9/04/2006 9:16 AM  
Blogger oldTiago said...

I went to her site, and I've seen her before, it's true. And if she likes football than she's ok, altough I don't understand how she doesn't like Totti.
I'll read the posts again with her figure in mind. Altough I guess that what troubles me the most about these posts is the reality show part: america's next top model now, (american idol) before, wich I've never seen.
Maybe i'm just missing the dumb fucking lesbian and your sweatpants attitude.

9/05/2006 1:27 PM  
Blogger Mrs Mopro said...

A Josh interview is up on AICN...

be bold

9/12/2006 5:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes.

9/14/2006 3:09 AM  
Blogger ThymeHBF said...

Now that is funny anonymous!

9/15/2006 1:43 AM  
Blogger thekeez said...

So great to have you back. In August I was diagnosed with liver and lung cancer - gave me three months. Rushed me into surgery the next day...

Turns out: benign lesion on my liver, pneumonia in my lung. I'm still a bit shell-shocked but apparently I'll be around a lot longer to read your blog...thekeez

9/15/2006 12:36 PM  
Blogger Larry said...

Josh.... I haven't checked your blog for a long time, but I see that it remains entertaining. I would love to get your take on "Black Dahlia" without offering any criticism of the film (it can't be any fun to get pummeled like this). I'm sure you have lots to say about it.

Larry Harnisch

9/17/2006 5:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Black Dahlia, have you actually seen this movie? Probably the only ethical thing you could do is burn the money you "earned" and then kill yourself. It might not completely clear your soul, but it's your only hope. That movie is bad, bad, bad.

9/17/2006 8:38 PM  
Blogger said...

Snakes on a catwalk... There is a good article about copyrighting fashion on, I think you might enjoy that. Crazy stuff

9/17/2006 10:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I went to see the BD over the weekend, and i am happy to say that i found it a v entertaining movie. The press havent been too kind over here (in London) and i guess every movie has its detractors, for whatever reason (and its bizarrely zealous haters, like the gent above), and in all honesty, the movie did have its flaws... it was hard to follow and a little overly convoluted towards the end, and the acting was occasionally a bit iffy. However, these points were (i thought) minor, it was certainly a very entertaining piece of cinema. Beautifully textured, and wonderfully detailed, something i think a lot of reviewers over here have missed. And the dinner scene, with Hilary Swank's family... brilliant.
Thank you very much Mr Friedman.

9/18/2006 2:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've found more designs at and

9/19/2006 2:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you - are funny.

10/02/2006 8:46 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Snakes on a catwalk, what WILL we think of next?

Anyway, I just found your blog, & it's cool!

If you want, check out my THE NEW ADVENTURES OF BATTLE BOY action serial. You can find weekly episodes over at

10/03/2006 7:48 PM  
Blogger Johnny said...

I still want to know how shooting art makes people confess to murder...

10/05/2006 10:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dude I find your lack of posts disturbing.

10/11/2006 2:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

'Dude I find your lack of posts disturbing.'

Dude, I find the fact that you're infringing on my copyrighted monicker disturbing though I agree with the sentiment. lol

10/12/2006 2:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Josh - we miss you.

10/19/2006 11:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Meh. I just realized that the entertainment industry whore is complaining about the clothing industry whore.

And I'm saying this as a motion graphics chick - which makes me just a plain ol' commercial whore I guess.

Without sweatshops there would be no super-models. Glossy magazines would have patterns for dresses in the latest Parisian fashions, and people would buy domestic fabrics for that one sensible winter dress, and either have it made to measure, or make it themselves.

My point being: being a supermodel, Tyra Banks has most likely solved any issues that she might have had about the existence of sweatshops.

If she can live with the fact that people work in unacceptable conditions, why should she withdraw acceptance when it's domestic reality writers in stead of foreign seamstresses?

One thing is that she might have a say in the matter this time, but another is that it just wouldn't be logical. Once you start caring, you have to care about the whole worl. Who wants to be a friggin Dalai Lama?

10/23/2006 3:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I find your lack of posting disturbing

My refresh button is wearing off ... looking forward to read NEW posts again.

10/24/2006 3:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Son,

I know it's been a while since I last wrote you. But, it doesn't seem nearly as long a time as your last entry about some reality model person about whom I could care less.

To an old dodderer like me, It seems like yesterday that your Mom (certainly not me) was changing your diapers. Your are old enough now to change your own; and I suggest you do it soon, as your months old entry is beginning to reak.

I admit that you lasted longer at this blogging thing than I expected, and Snakes on a Plane got you some unexpected mileage. And, I know you are deep into your dance with the Terminator and have little time between that effort and attending to your own family.

But, now is the real test of your core and whether the grindstone wears you down or sharpens you. After all, how much time does it take to offer up some pablum for the old man? Forget the other bloggees' frustration with your not posting for two months and pay attention to mine; they have not paid the dues that I have. So, either dance soon for me monkey boy, or pack this thing in.

Love to my daughter-in-law and my grandson,

Your Father

10/24/2006 1:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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10/28/2006 12:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I've dug ditches for $7.50 an hour and I feel reality TV writers are abused and underpaid. (Can you actually speak from the same experience?) Just about anyone can get a job as a ditch digger (or something equally gruelling), but years of effort and dedication go into breaking into television. TV writing requires just a tad more knowledge and education than sticking a shovel into the ground.

Justifying one unfairness by comparing it with another unfairness only lends support to the status quo. If we can't deal with unfairness to anyone until those most unfairly treated have a remedy then we will never make any headway. No doubt someone will come up a group that has it worse than ditch diggers. And that will become the excuse to ignore the abuse of ditch diggers...and sweat shop workers...and child labourers.


10/29/2006 10:33 AM  
Blogger Playa!!! said...

honor thy parents that thy days might be long upon the americas. listen to your dad and please give us a little something new.

10/30/2006 12:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really love the blog. I hope a fresh slice of gold is posted soon.

10/30/2006 6:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't know if anyone on here watches the show "Weeds" on Shotime, but they used the motherfucking snakes line! Josh, you should totally get reimbursed for that.

And you should also totally write another post. About anything.

11/01/2006 3:40 PM  
Blogger Mrs Mopro said...

maybe the DAD should fill in as long as the monkey is busy elsewhere.

11/02/2006 10:54 AM  
Blogger DDog said...


I caught a few episodes of "Weeds." I wish the valedictorian at my high school gave a speech like that. Nice use of the snakes line. Josh, sir, you've gots ta get paid for that one.

11/02/2006 7:05 PM  
Blogger Guy Barry said...

All your comments really made me laugh.Great blog

11/04/2006 3:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have more writing talent in my little finger than Josh has in his whole body.

Terminator TV series? War of the Worlds remake?

Josh, do you have any ideas of your own?

11/06/2006 2:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I totally admire your devotion to regularly posting on your online diary.

11/06/2006 11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congratulations on the pilot's pick up.

11/08/2006 10:11 AM  
Blogger Nicolas said...

search it. buy it. love it.

11/08/2006 11:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i think a new post will come when this cycle of top model ends. there's only 6 girls left... (i like caridee and the twins, melrose is good but too bitchy to win)

11/11/2006 5:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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11/15/2006 4:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Josh - is this blog over? Or are we going to get fucking terminator stories or what?
I know suspense is a cornerstone of drama, but last post 14th August? (My birthday, incidentally).
Not even Hitch could sustain it that long.

11/24/2006 2:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very good article...infomational for sure...looking forward to reading some more posts placed on this topic...will be checking this page again..have saved in favorites and bookmarked...thanks

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11/24/2006 2:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Might want to at least weed out the cobwebs and spammers. They're starting to collect under the bed.

11/27/2006 10:36 AM  
Blogger Johnny said...

this blog has been terminated...

12/02/2006 10:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

nice humor,an verry good blog.

12/05/2006 5:55 AM  
Blogger Linky Love said...
The only F word I know is 5FU,
yup that reads : 5 F u!

These days I try to tell a less happy story with some added humor.

Care for exchanging a link with me at: ?

Best of hugs,

You joke about your cancer?
... You must be sick! :-)
Metastatic Liver Cancer

12/07/2006 11:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Josh, I hope your lack of posting isn't because your anal canal is full of keyboard.

Rough treatment in the Times, man.

12/08/2006 8:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gotta pull this one out of bookmarks. Starting to feel massively stupid every time I click over here to see nothing changed. Especially since the "Snakes on a..." joke has officially immolated itself with overuse.

See ya.

12/19/2006 9:10 PM  
Blogger Roger Alford said...

I think Josh died again.

12/20/2006 2:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've checked this site once a day since August 14th and I can no longer handle being constantly reminded of Snakes on a Plane and Tyra Banks all in the same headline.

Think I'll just delete this bookmark until a new post is referenced on August's blog.

Wow, I really showed you, Josh Friedman! Now go and make something that will actually give you a fuckin' license to talk so much shit about everyone!

12/27/2006 9:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Discovering good writing on an obviously dead blog is like finding a middle book in a series of 12.
Maybe you're out writing a series of great books.

12/28/2006 1:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bookmark deleted, cancer boy.

12/29/2006 12:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love it when people who don't actually work in reality tv spout off with all they think they know about reality tv, starting with how overpaid story people are.

I personally don't consider a story editor a writer either; however, I find the comparison to a reality story editor and a writer who adapts a screenplay apt. Reality story departments wade through thousands of hours of the most boring footage imaginable on tape. They turn it into 12 - 20 hours of watchable storyline so that yahoos who like that sort of thing can meet up at the watercooler the next day to talk about what a crazy gold-digging psychopath Trish is and who should win the million dollars. I have been one of the hapless souls who had to log all that boring crap, one of the assistant story editors who had to coalate all of it and locate specific bites within it, and one of the story editors who "paper cut" an episode to give to the editors who used my SCRIPT to cut the whole thing together, from minute one to minute "60". I love that some of you assholes will actually stand there and claim an editor did all my fucking work. On some shows, they do. Not the ones I work on. The shows where an editor does it all do not have story departments, other than the loggers and the 1-3 people who assemble acceptable bits for the editors to choose from. So those of you who think an editor does my job can blow me. I *wish* I got paid what an editor makes. Which brings me to my portion of rant, which is that reality story-tellers do not make the bank some of you clueless mouths seem to think we do. Sometimes we do luck into nicely paying positions, but more often than not, we work 70 hours a week for what boils down to a little over $10/hour. That might be above what your beloved ditch digger makes, but it's hardly fucking bank or paying for the Rolls, especially in a city where a one bedroom apartment in a rundown building in the shit part of town goes for $800 a month. So spare me your fucking angst about being overpaid. As for you elitist mouths saying I don't belong in the WGA because I'm not a writer and it waters down the gene pool, you're right. I am not, strictly speaking, a writer. Unless I work for a documentary-style show where I craft an entire voice over script for someone to narrarate, I don't have to actually write original words for someone else to regurgitate on screen. It might interest you to know that when I do work on one of those documentary-style shows, I still make crap pay AND I'm not in the WGA, but whatever; I'm sure you and the rest of your WRITER pals can rest easy knowing I'm not allowed to join your little club. Why you should be allowed to reap the benefit of your scripted projects while I am not allowed the same is beyond me, but let me appeal to your baser side: It would seem to me it's in your own best interest to allow me to join your union, since the more fucking members you have, the greater your collective bargaining power. But I guess you'd rather stand there and hack away at your nose. Well-done, illustrious wordsmith. You so totally rock.

1/07/2007 1:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So fucking quit and stop fucking whining. honestly.

1/10/2007 4:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello, Josh.

Please write more stuff. I don't care if it's about how your dishwasher can't handle more than 26 plates at once, just write something. I love the way you write and I love reading your stuff. About anything.

Thank you.

3/07/2007 2:29 AM  
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It is useful? maybe!
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3/27/2007 11:51 PM  
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4/10/2007 5:57 PM  
Blogger Soft Drink Connisseur said...

Hey Josh. Just wanted to drop a note and let you know a few things. First off, I love your blog, it's hysterical. I read it at work and sometimes laugh out loud prompting questions from co-workers asking "what is so funny?" Keep it up man, it's a good read.

Secondly, I love the Terminator show. It's by far my favorite show on TV. I'm also glad that FOX got it right with being able to view the episodes online, and love the recaps section. As an aspiring screenwriter, I use the recaps to help me write my own outlines, very helpful and a great site. Additionally, out of all the networks and online shows, the FOX viewer is the best in my opinion. Why can't we watch Nip/Tuck online and why is AMC screwing up the online streams and schedules of Breaking Bad?

Lastly, it irks me that some may successful people dont believe in God. Makes me wonder whether or not successful people find the true power and God within, rather than the masses praying to the giant wish master in the sky, praying for a miracle and waiting on a dream that never comes. I'm inspired by your work. Best of luck and stay healthy you fat bastard, we need you around.

Bill M.

2/22/2008 4:44 PM  
Blogger Soft Drink Connisseur said...

Terminator Finale feedback:

First off, big, big fan of the show. I thought the finale was a bit weak. I was expecting a lot more. I think it went off on a tangent with the guys that had the Turk. There werent any forward flashbacks that I thought were really great in the episode Dungeons and Dragons. Some cool scenes with the cops falling into the pool, should have been more blood though to make it look realistic, however, very cinematical.

The video of the Terminator chip was OK, could have revealed more cool stuff though, maybe like a hidden command from a main computer or a prime terminator that controls them all. I would have liked to see the factory where the terminators are made, and also the concentration camps where the humans are held prisoner in the future. Maybe we'll see that in Season 2. I think they have to show John Connor storming the robot guards and leading the escape.

I liked the terminators dragging the jet engine and thought that was clever that it was part of the time machine. By the way, what the hell gives a terminator power? Is it nuclear? If so, you would think they could drum up enough energy from their nuclear arsenal to build the time machine rather then link a bunch of jet engines. Just thoughts. Hope there is a season 2.


3/08/2008 1:37 PM  
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so fck you.

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